Really!?

Ever get so pissed off you dont know how to express it or even deal with it...well thats me today.

For the past year, everything ive done jusg isnt good enough for certain people. My girlfriends parents im mainly talking about.

We decorate our bedroom in january but i got told her dad had to do it as hes better.

We braught my old rabbitt hutch to this house, before we new it as we popped out her dad had built it saying he could do it better...even though i built it first time around.

I start to build our rabbit run, he finishes it saying he was better.

I plant so flowers in the garden in pots, ever day we go down and hes taken over with them again.

Today, i sort out my girlfriend bike so she can start new challenges again. All is safe, she rode it and was comfy and all was working well. Her dad comes up to the bedroom and tells us he will be sorting it tomorrow and cleaning it as hes built bikes since the age of 13...and that doesnt make u any better than me. I too have built bikes, and cars to that fact.

Its pissing me off. Everything i do here is never good enough for them. I mean i dont actualy care how immature they are being about everything. The thing i care about is that its making me feel like shit, constantly being put downand being made to think im never good enough. Its an insult and i hate it.

Im off to be depressed now...that is if i can do that right also!?

TTFN

XXXX

Death

Ironically the though of death scares me, yet given the chance i would end my life tonight.

Yes ok some people have it worse off than me, but this is my life. This isnt how i use to live and this isnt how i want to live.

Yes people who have been told they only have a few weeks to live literally want to do everything they can and see everyone to say goodbye
I guess the lucky (if u can call it lucky) thing here is that theyve been given that warning. That chance to say goodbye.
With my illness, i could literally die at any point. Without any warning and without any friends or family

I sucks.

It feels like im in prison and on deaths row. Just casually sat here waiting for it to be my time.

Why is more not being done about asthma.

Why is there no media on it. No regular press releases. No regular adverts raising awareness. We deserve that is nothing else right!?

Im not going to go into details to justify why i would end my life in a second because there are to many reasons. All you need to know is that, asthma sucks. The side effects from all these life saving lung medications suck.

Dont take your life for granted. You never know when it may abruptly come to an end.

TTFN

XXXX

Death

Ironically the though of death scares me, yet given the chance i would end my life tonight.

Yes ok some people have it worse off than me, but this is my life. This isnt how i use to live and this isnt how i want to live.

Yes people who have been told they only have a few weeks to live literally want to do everything they can and see everyone to say goodbye
I guess the lucky (if u can call it lucky) thing here is that theyve been given that warning. That chance to say goodbye.
With my illness, i could literally die at any point. Without any warning and without any friends or family

I sucks.

It feels like im in prison and on deaths row. Just casually sat here waiting for it to be my time.

Why is more not being done about asthma.

Why is there no media on it. No regular press releases. No regular adverts raising awareness. We deserve that is nothing else right!?

Im not going to go into details to justify why i would end my life in a second because there are to many reasons. All you need to know is that, asthma sucks. The side effects from all these life saving lung medications suck.

Dont take your life for granted. You never know when it may abruptly come to an end.

TTFN

XXXX

Eyes!!

Steroids are a bugger right!? Yes!! But without them my lungs would be erm...shitter than what they are now.

As a downside though you can get loads of nasty side effects, and my body sesms to like to get them all.

Recently,my eyes have been getting a lot lot worse, I already know that I have cateracts, but now im starting to panic that I have glaucoma.

The reason I think this is because Im getting a lot of headaches, even on waking up and my eyes havnt been used, Ive also got these weird little brown spots starting to appear in the iris part of my eyes. On top of this they are also getting a lot blurrier.

Ok I may be think of the extreme or it may just be my cateracts getting worse,but the thought of having glaucoma really scares the shit out of me.

Looks like im off to the opticians on my next pay day!!

TTFN

XXXX