Beating Statistics

Well first i would like to talk about my title in that myself and my Mrs has beating statistics at Derriford Hospital Immunology clinic. Aparently a person is meant to take 6 weeks to be trained how to do self injection of Sub Cut IgG treatmemt, myself and the lady on the other hand have learnt it in 3 weeks and as of next week we wills be at home doing it ourselves. I am soooo overly happy with this is as it means theres no worries about missing doses over christmas because of needing to be in Bristol to make sure that Dixie is having to be put up for adoption.
Im still amazed at how quickly we have picked it up, i mean i know its not hard drawing up a blood product, attaching it to a pump, stabbing my belly and pressing go but to some people it obviously takes a little longer.

In other news, last night and i guess still aparet of me today is feeling a little down in the baby department. I really want to expand on our family. Weve been trying now for nearly a year to have a baby and we seem to be getting know where. Im also feeling crap in that i want to be able to be a real mum. Not just one on the birth certificate of my wifes child. I want a child that was created by me. One that i habe carried myself. One that has grown within me. Its just not going to happen,not in the direct near future anyway because of my health and drugs.

Why cant life be fair. Equal. Easy!?

TTFN

XXXX

Just A Few Hours Of Normality

Some may say that 2 and a bit hours out the house for some "normality" is pathetic, but for me, it took every last inch of breath and energy.

I saw a banner a few weeks ago for a festival in Lostwethial called Lostfest so i decided that myself and my partner deserved a break from the house and we went a long.

Granted it wasnt as good as we hoped it would be but the rain stayed away and at the end of it we saw something other than the four walls of our bedroom.

On the way back we stopped by a huge discount store called trago and we picked ip another 4 balls of wool. I then completed 2 more baby hats and a templete for some scratch mittens.

Of course just doing this few hours of stuff exhausted ne beyond beleif and i used a whole inhaler whilst out and about. Both my lungs and muscles really struggled to cope. As a result i then slept for 4 hours this afternoon trying to recover.

Dont get me wrong, i love the fact i have got out the house eventually just to mosey around, but im still cheesed off for what it done to my body as a result.

I cant wait to start feeling "human" again. What ever that is. As i can no longer remember!

TTFN

XXXX

Typical Day

For me the weekend doesnt really change from any other day of the week. Other than the shops being busy and you see more people walking about the village, its all just another day for me.

I decided last night that it was time for my hair to have a change again. I jeeded a fresh look. Make myself feel good.

So, me being me the minute i woke, i done my usual routine and then we headed off to asda to buy dye.

Although me hair is blonde, i decided i wanted it blonder so we go a bright bleacg blonde. I also wanted to add some colour too so we got a bright pink too. My partner got black. Talk about complete opposites lol.

Once all my hair was dyed blonde, my partner cut it for me, re done my shaven patch and upon my request i got her to put two zig zag lines across my shaven patch. When the pink was ready to b applied, we done my usual fringe bit and also the zig zags. With having pre lightened my hair it now looks friggin amazing. Nice an bright and colourful. Although my partner used the same pink, because she dyed her hair black initially, hers turned out a plum colour which for her looks stunning.

Just doing this though completly exhausted me so i had to go back to bed...three hours later im awake not realising how exhausted i must of been. I do get annoyed by this. For the average person, they would dye and cut their hair after a 6 hour day at work or something very similar and not be anywhere near as tired as me. I do wish some days that my life wasnt like this.

When i eventually woke up properly, i was extremly itchy, so i put on my glasses and i could see why. I was having yet another full blown reaction. I was as red as a beetroot and my lips were double to size. Eventually after 6 antihistames, things started to return to their usual self, and no epi pen was needed but i think if these antihistamines hadnt of kicked in, i would have been stabbing myself in the leg again!!

Ive also managed to knit another 2 hats today so i now have 5 in total ready to send to my first NICU unit. Only another 25 to go and thre gift box will be off to the post!!

Untill next time...

TTFN

XXXX

Goals And Challenges

After my shit news yesterday about potentially not being able to have children, I decided to set my self a challenge. Whilst I was in hospital last week, a very good friend of mind suggested I start knitting, it doesnt take much muscle mass to do and certainly doesnt take and lung power, so off I pop to youtube and have so far self taught myself how to make baby hats. I have currently made 2 for mine and my partners future children, I am hust waiting for more wool to arrive in the mail and ill be making my sisters baby a hat and ive also currently made two others of different sizes. These extra two hats are going towards my challenge. My challenge being that im going to make 30 baby hats for every NICU unit in England to which there are 165. So that roughly 4950 little baby hats I have set my self to knit. This for me would be an ace goal to achieve, not only because its keeping me busy but also, I cant do things like donate blood or stem cells any more because of my deterioration in gealrh so doing this will make me feel mentally great about being able to help both the tiny little babies who are poorly and also their families because not many clothes fit such small children. On average at the moment im making one hat a day as it does cause me cramps so I fear it could take me a little while to achieve my challenge, but im sure I will feel fantastic when not only the first box is done but also the 165th box just like I felt great after I made the first hat. I will keep you all up to date with my progress of course. In other news today Ive not been to great. I went down stairs briefly today as we purchased Dixie a paddling pool because she loves water, but that small amount for "doing somethinf" totally exhausted me and ive been asleep all afternoon as a result. In good news though, myself and my partner have been in contact the the local registry office in Bodmin about booking our wedding. They are just sorting a few things put and will be getting back to us. Marriage for us is super important as it means that legalky when we have children, because we are married we are both legally allowed on the birth certificate so both play an equal, fair and legal role withing any future childs life. So, theres a lot to keep you posted with...untill next time... TTFN XXXX

Amazing Few Days!!

As you can tell, all has been a little hush hush with me for the last few days and heres why: On Tuesday, I drove myself and my other half to Dorset, we were booked into a travelodge for a few days. We know that there was a pub next door, but we didnt know there was a KFC to the otherside. But, we were good and restrained ourselves. Untill we drove to Glastonbury for a great little outing which was lush because my lovely lady had never been there, anyway, we had a krushem, which to be fair was blinking good of us to not eat also. In Glastonbury, we of course went charity shop shopping and have got some fantastic baby clothes for our potential future baby. Yes I know what you may be thinking, why buy it when your not expecting. But these are the best clothes ever and they are all made for that specific culture. They are bright, colourful and very much unique, aswell as super blinking cheap. Wednesday was also a big but fantastic day for us. We had planned to meet the man that could potentially made our dream come true for being parents. We met him at 1130am and had been chatting for a whole hour despite having been chatting to him for over a month. He was perfect. Polite, happy, intelligent man that has a heart of gold. He also signed a contract for us stating that he would have nothing to do wiith any child/ren that may be concieved from this. Excitedly, he also gave us a donation on Wednesday so in a few weeks we will see if all went as planned, though we keep reminding ourselves that it may not happen just so we dont build up our hopes up. On Thursday we sadly had to come home, and early because we had arranged to look after a good friends little boy whilst she went to an appointment. It has been fantastic to have a great few days away. We literally just chilled, were ourselves again, watched lots of amazing retro films and we had a really nice meal, just the two of us with no stresses. I cant wait for our camping trip in a few weeks time just to be able to be ourselves again, though when camping, we will have the little puppy then where as this time we didnt have her. Though, this will be exciting none the less. Today has a bit of a scatty day. Initially, we got up and went swimming. Because we had a few bad foods whilst we were away, we decided to do 80 lengths to burn off those things we ate. After swimming I then had to go buy a new glass for my wing mirror as the final half decided to fall out yesterday following some twat hitting it last december. Then, I had to run my lovely lady to meet with her new healthy trainer lady to get a little more help with our weightloss plan. Whilst she was with the lady, I took Dixie to the park for a little run around. Its been a great but very VERY exhausting few days, but annoyingly, we cant rest up tomorrow, we have to go to Bridgwater and empty my storage unit and we have to be there by 9am so its a wake up at 0530-0600 depending on which time I can be bothered to wake up to. TTFN XXXX