Goals And Challenges

After my shit news yesterday about potentially not being able to have children, I decided to set my self a challenge. Whilst I was in hospital last week, a very good friend of mind suggested I start knitting, it doesnt take much muscle mass to do and certainly doesnt take and lung power, so off I pop to youtube and have so far self taught myself how to make baby hats. I have currently made 2 for mine and my partners future children, I am hust waiting for more wool to arrive in the mail and ill be making my sisters baby a hat and ive also currently made two others of different sizes. These extra two hats are going towards my challenge. My challenge being that im going to make 30 baby hats for every NICU unit in England to which there are 165. So that roughly 4950 little baby hats I have set my self to knit. This for me would be an ace goal to achieve, not only because its keeping me busy but also, I cant do things like donate blood or stem cells any more because of my deterioration in gealrh so doing this will make me feel mentally great about being able to help both the tiny little babies who are poorly and also their families because not many clothes fit such small children. On average at the moment im making one hat a day as it does cause me cramps so I fear it could take me a little while to achieve my challenge, but im sure I will feel fantastic when not only the first box is done but also the 165th box just like I felt great after I made the first hat. I will keep you all up to date with my progress of course. In other news today Ive not been to great. I went down stairs briefly today as we purchased Dixie a paddling pool because she loves water, but that small amount for "doing somethinf" totally exhausted me and ive been asleep all afternoon as a result. In good news though, myself and my partner have been in contact the the local registry office in Bodmin about booking our wedding. They are just sorting a few things put and will be getting back to us. Marriage for us is super important as it means that legalky when we have children, because we are married we are both legally allowed on the birth certificate so both play an equal, fair and legal role withing any future childs life. So, theres a lot to keep you posted with...untill next time... TTFN XXXX

My Recent Adventures

8 days ago I got admitted to heartlands in preperation for my operation which was on Tuesday.

I went down at 1230 and got told I would be 45 minutes. 3 hours later the finally take me off the ventilator. The reasons for this was because my lungs had a massive disagreement dropped their sats and started to struggle. So as you can tell I worried a lot of people.

I finally got back to the ward at 6pm or there after and wasnt really with it at all.

The pain was so bad I really didnt know what to do with myself. It doesnt help that I couldnt have local in my tummy because Im allergic to it.

The next day was still pretty much the same, still loads of pain, unable to breath properly or cough so they upped all my pain releif in the hope it would sort things.

Thursday was going good. Pain was starting to get sorted and I started to be able to cough again but sadly I had developed a chest infection so had to stay yet another night and be started on antibiotics.

Around 5pm on Thursday, everything I was drinking I was bring back up. Which wasnt good as aparently this operation is supposed to stop me from being able to vommit. So they done an urgent xray to find out what was going on...I had a bowel obsturction - twist in my bowel so I was put nil by mouth and given fluids. To top things off my pain releif was reduced as they needed to wake my bowel up as it had gone to sleep.

So not only have I got operation pain but also have my agonising hip pain back.

The weekend has been pretty uneventful other than me being depressed and thinking about everything and also being in far to much pain.

I am hoping to leave tomorrow but currently I am still vomiting everything I try to eat/drink which isnt right.

My consultant in Birmingham has also requested and MRI scan of my hip to find out what is going on as they think its highly likely to be linked to my steroids. Perfect!!

Well thats my ramble for now.

TTFN

XXXX

The Call

Yesterday I had the call from Birmingham telling us there was a bed free on the respiratory ward.

Five hours later and we arrive. The traffic was hell, from post holiday drivers to accidents to road works to pure phantom traffic.

Mums new boyfriend came with us, and although I was pissed off at first for mum not asking me and also telling me that my girlfriend couldnt come coz the hospital wouldnt allow it, he was great, made me chuckle and really relaxed the whole situation. I have to admit its great that he is being so involved and supportive and helpful, the complete opposite to what mum old partner was like.

The doc came and said that basically all they are doing is increasing my steroids and giving me oxygen if I need it.

Have to admit im a little narcked off that ive been admitted 4 days pre op just to up my steroids.

They still insistes on cannulating me and it took 6 attempt. I was meant to be having a picc line but the doc said that wouldnt happen over the weekend.

Altogether I think its pretty shabby how the whole situation has gone, but I am bow here so I have to sit and wait.

I am on day 13 of my liquid diet and weirdly Ive lost no weight at all this week, really bizarre considering im only having 1000 calories if that a day.

Well I should stop ranting now but ill keep you all updated.

TTFN

XXXX

Ps the pictures are of my lovely photo frame that I have of my and my girlfriend and hanging off it is the special healing stones she purchased me as a gift. Also of my new spongebob pjs and my injuries already.