Not The Best

Yesterday I had an appointment to see a hip surgeon to see whether or not he qas brave enough to operate on my stupid hip. The night before i was shitting my pants as ive stopped breathing on the last 2 surgeries ive had and they struggled to bring me back so i was meantally working out whether this is a wise choice.

My other half didnt come with me as i said there was no point in her not going to her volunteering as i knew what was wrong with my hip so it was just a yes or no to surgery.

Boy was i wrong.

The consultant asked me what I knew about my hip and what i had done so i said i had a plain xray that stated i had deterioration of my femeral hip AKA AVN. I then had a plain MRI that showed nothing more so they gave me a steroid injection into my hip in theatre. This increased my pain so they done an MRI that showed I had a laberal tear in my joint. And then i got told i needed surgery and here we are.

His face dropped...and then i started to worry.

He then said he was sorry but i havnt been told the full degree or extent of my hip. He then went onto inform me that i had an inpingement. I thought thats ok, wheres the worry in that I had one in my shoulder, i still have it as i refused shoulder...i can live with that.

But that wasnt all of it...

He then went onto explain that not only do i have the other 3 problems but i also have backwards hips. In other words, they are facing the wrong way. Erm hello, why is it i am 23 and this has never been picked up on before!?

Thats not all, he then went onto explain that along with the other 4 issues, my femurs are also protruding into my pelvis.

Fuck...i just wanted to cry...but sadly he had more to tell me.

He explained that my AVN is minor at the moment so hes not all that concerned and itll be a while before that needs surgical intervention ...  amazing, finally some good news!!

WRONG!!

As i also need surgery on my backwards facing femur proturding hip. He has orgered an urgebt CT scan to see how much bone is actually in the wrong place. I will then be seeing him in 8 weeks which is September 22nd because depending on how much bone is deformed will decided on how quickly and where i have surgery. He is about 80% sure though that i will needs the specialist surgery which he cant do as its to complex for him and hes never seen it in someone of my age before. So he will be refering me to the specialist. Wait for it...who is in London. I will have to go to the other side of the UK from where i live to have surgery.

But wait, theres still more...he also told me, my left hip is identical to the right hip (which is the painful one) so very soon i will be in extreme pain with that hip too and i will need surgery on this hip also.

im gutted. Not only should this have been picked up on at birth but i will be alone on the day of my surgery unless we cam save up a hell of a lot of money to pay for my other half to be in a hotel the whole time im in hospital.

Im absolutly devested and pissed off all on one.

I dont get why the last hospital i was under didnt tell me that my hips were facing the wrong wag and that my femurs were sat in my pelvis. Why didnt they see this as an urgent thing like this consultant in Cornwall has.

I got told in april that the pain is in my head and that there was nothing wrong...yet actually there is severe problems wrong.

I potentially cant have anyone with me during my surgery. What if this time they cant actually get my breathing going again!?

I cant wait for all this medical shit to leave me alone. I want it all to stop. I dont think i cant cope with much more

TTFN

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Could Any More Shit Possibly Happen!?

A day out of hospital and there I was casually relaxing on the sofa trying to recover. Untill my mum comes home.

She didnt ask me how I was or what I had been up to just "did you still have money to give me as Im short"

Lets go back a few steps and Ill fill you in. My mum moved her new boyfirend in a little over two weeks ago, so I told mum I was giving her less money as I should be payong thirds as thats fair. Her response to me for that was you can fuck off. Charming hey. Little did she know I was being deadly serious.

So reverting back to yesterday, I responded to mum about me being serious about not giving her as much money and that of her new boyfriend is giving her money also there was no need.

This kicked off a massive argument of her calling me a selfish cow, an ungreatful bitch and a few more nastiness. She also told me I should be paying her more for her having to run me up and down the country to my hospital appointments. I reminded her that mentally im not coping with yet another diagnosis (to which she said oh ok to) and also about my friend Dawn passing away-her answer to this was we all have friends that die. This argument went on for about 45 minutes to which I was crying my eyes out and devestated my mum gave more of a shit about me not paying her an extra £150 over my physical and mental well being. At the end of this argument mum told me to get the fuck out of the house.

Little did she know I would actually go also!!

5 minutes later her boyfriend come back and they went for a walk with the dog.

In that time I had pack all my medications and a few bits of clothes, grabbed my rabbits in their hutches (bearing in mind I shouldnt be lifting after my surgery) and I filled the car with as much as possible. I rang my girlfriend in a right state with what just happened and because her family are so bloody amazing they have allowed me to move in with them.

This is going to be a struggle hospital wise as itll take 5 hours to get to my birmingham appointments and im going to have to try and find a decent hospital now in cornwall.

I cant believe that not only have I got to deal with a rapidly deteriorating shit health but I now have to try and move all my stuff out. So much from recovering from surgery with major complications. Im just glad that I now have a lovely relaxed new home with great support and care so I can atleast try and recover a little bit.

Well thats it for the dramatic life of me!!

TTFN

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