Moving Forward

Yesterday ive finally got to a pain team appointment. Ive been having chronic on going pain, not just for my hip but because of the myopathy from the steroids. Unfortunatly at present no intervension is possible unless its with pain releif. Ive been maxing out on paracetamol, tramadol, codiene and oramorph with little to no effect so now ive been started on a tens machine which is hooked to my hip 24/7 and i turn it on for 1.5 hours every 4 times a day. Ive also been started on bupanorphine patch ontop of everything else. So far theres been no change other than the bupanorphine knocking me out and the tens machine causing pins and needles down my leg. My life seems like such an adventure lol.

Ubfortunatly, my friend who I mentioned a little while back, has remained in hospital and had started rehab and moved to a ward, sadly though today she has had to be taken back to intensive back and has been reventilated, really hope she continues to fight through this nasty infection that is still pumping through her body.

Weve had regular updates with regards to Dixie being at her foster mums. Initially we thought we have had to put her in the kennels as she wouldnt stop crying us which was resulting in noone sleeping. The foster mum had spoke to her husband and they decided that because she wasnt like a normal foster dog they looked after, they would let her upstairs in their sons room with him and suprise suprise, shes aparently the perfect house guest which is amazing to hear. So much so that the foster mum even felt she could let her off the lead over the feild today. Its lush to hear that shes doing so well. Just hope she remembers us when she comes home.

Thats all for now

TTFN

XXXX

Frown Isnt Upside Down!!

Ok so im still strunning to see light at the end of the tunnel.

Everytime i think something fantastic is happening, I get knocked back down!!

I had the doc ring me up on Thursday because it seems we are having the same battle as last time for keeping my aminophylline levels up so i am now on 600mg a day to see if that does the trick.

Today my other halfs sister arrived back in the UK after a week abroad on holiday...next thing we know weve got a text stating they have our invitation and she then starts getting nasty that weve not invited them to the ceremony. 10 minutes later i get a facebook message from her girlfriend saying shes not coming to the meal weve invited to because she cant see the justification in taking time off work to come down for a meal they have to pay for, so i reminded her that there doesnt need to be a justification, we just wanted our family to celebrate our day with us...i guess for some thats a hard concept to grasp!? I wonder if i could tell them that i dont see the justification in doing their wedding photography for their wedding next june!? I wont because im not nasty. I want to be there for their big day even though it means travelling 300miles and 4 hours to get there, then paying out for a hotel and then travelling back...never mind the fact that i am disabled and struggle to drive 20 minutes!!

Anyway, rant over for now.

In other news, im a little concerned about my muscles. To those that dont know, ive been diagnosed with proximal myopathy which basically is a muscle wasting illness from being on long term steroids for my asthma. Its now getting to the point that im struggling to hold my head up, my neck musclsa are really starting to struggle and im having to wrap my V pillow over my shoulders and under my head to support myself. This is the last thing i want. This is another kick in the teeth for being disabled. I know my consultants had warned me but they said years to come like 10 years...not 10 months down the line.

Im currently at mums now though. We needed to get out the house. The stress is getting to much and its making me even more depressed. It also helps mum and my sister out as she was meant to be dog sitting for our mum whilst shes at a friends wedding but with her being 31 weeks pregnant, having a hyper dog running round your feet isnt wise, so weve braught Dixie with us and were looking after the 2 dogs.

Well, im off to sleep now as yesterday anoth migraine set in and its hanging around again.

TTFN

XXXX

Frustration!!

Saturday was an amazing day. Me and the other half decided to invest in a puppy. Dixie is absolutly amazing, I couldnt have asked for anything else.

I have been a little naughty on the night times though. Because of my crappy lungs I dont sleep all that well so when Dixie is awake and winging a little bit, Ive decided for the past two nights to pick her up and cuddle her...yes,I know HUGE bad idea. I hope she wont pick up on it again tonight...or rather I dont give in as easily haha.

Well,the point of this post is because the other halfa mum is massively pissing me off and I have no idea what to do about it.

She also got a puppy on Saturday and wont get off the fucking internet reading about how best to train your new puppy. Shes then telling us all about it and then telling us that we shouldbt do this and we shouldnt do that...because the internet says so. Weve told her we dont care what the internet says, we are our own individual people and we want to teach and train our little girl as we want.

Also, we woke up at 9 today and the other halfs mum had ago at us...because Dixie was meant to be fed at 0730. If she was hungry she would have been awake and moaning, but she wasnt so if we wanna sleep we will!!

Other things are, shes getting nasty if our puppy wees on the floor by accident but then hers does it.

Shell also say that we shouldnt be cuddling Dixie as often as we are as she will become to dependant on us.

There is a whole lot more but I think if I tell you it all I may scare you away.

I want to live my life with my girlfriend and our pets and eventually our children.

To be honest im scared also. If shes treating us like this about a puppy, what the bleeding heck is she gunna do when we have our baby, is she gunna dictate and tell us were doing things wrong...I hope not!!

TTFN

XXXX