Suprises

Nearly three years ago now I turned 21. Most people remember this birthday as a special one with great memories and events. For me it was crap just like the last ten birthdays I have had.for me this one was rubbish for a new reason,I was in hospital up until the day before,I had a photo shoot booked for my actual birthday but I was extremly exhausted and looked like shit, and worst of all my then step dad had told his kids that him and my mum had recently got engaged. The cried, screamed and made a point if ruining my day. With how ny birthdays have gone, I made a promise to myself, and that was that anyone new who enters into my life would get treated amazingly on their birthdays and this year, it was my wifes 21st bithday, november 25th to be exact. From my previous blog you can see that on the 23rd I got her a guinea pig, yes nearly a week on we do finally have a name, it being Heidi. My other half loves her and it has helped give her a great daily focus and a new meaning to get out if bed in the morning, other than to just help me. On Tuesday I had a huge suprise for her also. During the day her parents took us for mcdonalds (which has upset me as they forgot it was her 21st and it seemed like they really didnt give a damn). At 5pm we started getting ready, all the usual questions kept being asked like where we going, what we doing, what do I need to wear. Of course I only let onto the clothes she needed lol. We then left at about 6ish to head to our destination. Jamie olivers fifteen resturaunt. She absolutly loved it. She had never been anywhere like this or ever had so much money spent on her. In my eyes though she deserves it. She does so much for me daily, she deserves to have something for her. So we dined in expensiveness and had moctales because we are so classy ha. At the end of the meal, because I prebooked and told them it was a big occassion, my lovely lady had 12 perposly baked cupcakes made for here and displayed on a wooden voard with chocolate sauce wrote on the board saying happy birthday. They also put canels in the cupcakes too. They treated us both so well, its hard to believe there are still amazing people and atmospheres out there. On wednesday, going a bit cheaper this time, I then took her to the cinema to watch the new hunger games film. Well, for me to as im addicted to it. We bith loved it and cant wait for the second part to be released. To top off the week, our new future sperm donor also rang to chat in person and he seems like such a nice cating person. I just really hope this means that soon, we could have child. Not only this but, my dad has agreed for me and the other half to let us stay with him for two weeks over christmas so that we could have Dixie. Like I say, this week has just been full of suprises. TTFN XXXX

My Life In A Nutshell

MONDAY 2ND JULY 2012.

Dont worry, im not expecting you to know why this date is of any significant value to anyone as it doesnt have one. This date though is the last time i blogged about my medication. The treatment that keeps me going. In 2012 i was with consultants that really wanted to start from scratch. Reduce nearly all my meds and find out the best ones from me. That didnt happen. Instead, they started adding more in.

Today things are worse than before.

During a 24 hour period i take on average 64 tablets a day, 16 nebulisers minimum. A salbutamol inhaler. A nasal spray. A tablet inhaler twice a day. A TENS machine, morphine patch. Supplements and im also now on sub cut IgG infusions of 60mls a week.

I wish my life was counting other things instead of drugs, oxygen reading, pulse reading and peak flow reading.

I guess being in the UK i am extremely lucky, my medications get funded by the NHS and the government. I really feel for those in other countries that have to pay for their treatments and its in the thousands. If their insurance wont cover it, how does the government expect them to get the vital medication they need!?

I know one things for sure, if i didnt have this list of medications, i would be dead. If any asthmatic didnt have one single inhaler, they would be dead.

Asthma needs to be more recognised. I have been doing this blog now for near on 2 years and in those 2 years. Ive literallt have my blog viewed thousands of time. I just pray that just 10 of those thousands of people have gained a little more knowledge into the life of an asthmatic. That they can see its not just a few puffs of a blue inhaler. Its time consuming, mind and bodily draining, its demanding and most of all its life threatening.

Asthma needs a cure, can you help find it!?

_____

On a different note, depression, this also is very life threatening and not enough people know about it. This week, Tuesday infact is my wifes 21st birthday and suffers from severe depression. With our housing situation this has meant that things have been getting worse again. I didnt know what to do, how to help her so,i gave her an early birthday present that she can focus on, and give a purpose of living for. I got her a guinea pig. We still dont have a name for her but she is 9 weeks old and such a character. Today is her first day with us and in ta time, she has climbed the curtain 3 times and climbed up the inside of my trouser leg twice. Shes blinking fast thats for sure

Well, i better be off, i have those drugs to go take so i can make it through the night as i am currently suffering yet another chest infection.

TTFN
XXXX

Here is a visual look into my medications and below is our latest family member, the nameless guinespig class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">

New Beginnings

Before I go onto the main subject of the post i thought i would share with you all that last monday i finally got that lump that was growing pretty quickly in my mouth removed. I had to have surgery to have this done and i was awake throughout it all. It was not nice at all but its gone so im please. Sadly though because the surgeon had to remove soooo much tissue because of the size of the lump, there then wasnt enough tissue left to stitch the two sides together so i now have a huge lump in the floor of my mouth. Its weird as i can stick my tongue in it lol.

On other notes though, and back to the title, as of 1330 pm on Thursday 13th November,my self and my girlfriend offically became married. It was absoulty amazing and everythibg went as planned. I was so please and happy.

We stayed in a 4 star hotel for 4 nices and blinking heck we wasnt use to it. It was so strange saying can you add the meal to our tab etc instead of paying straight away. Weve decided though that we must go back. The treatment there was amazing and we went swimming aswell as it was all included in the price.

Our next big suprise is my wifes 21st birthday. All her presents are wrapped and ready, Now we just need the big day to arrive.

TTFN

XXXX

Suprises!!

I know its super early for a blog but I figured I would use the clocks going back to my advantage. The lovely lady is still asleep and this blog is about her and I cant risk her seeing it!!

A few weeks ago my other half had said whilst watching Janie Olivers fifteen minute meals that she would love to go to his resturaunt as shes heard its amazing and top quality food. (I agreed as ive been to one). She said "if only we could afford it for my 21st Birthday". Told her that unfortunatly that more than likely wouldnt be possible simply because it cost so much and we can nooooo way afford it.

Hehe

Well, a few days ago I have just made it happen.

I got in contact with the reservations team through email (as when your other half is with you 24/7 because they look after you, it makes ringing very difficul) and they have been amazing.

They told me of everything that was available and what I could do.

Sooo, on the 25th of Novemember (which is her actual birthday) we have a table book at the Cornwall resturaunt for 7pm. as I told her it was for her 21st birthday, they said that on their plates during pudding etc and other little occasions, they will write birthday messages to her from the chefs. (Amazing!!!!!). Ive also had it arranged that they will be baking 12 cupcakes that will be displayed on a lush cake stand and brought over to our table at the end of the meal hehe.

They are amazing there. They have gone all out and really made her Birthday seem that little bit amazing.

Now all I have to do is try and keep it a secret for another 30 days else itll all be ruined.

TTFN

XXXX

Overwhelmed

Just woke up after falling asleep and its all abit weird in my head. So much has happened and its now getting to me.

Firstly,my friend i told u about is getting better. Shes now out of the critical stage and back with us talking and growing strong. Thank goodness. So pleased as was ubber worried.

The next thing being that Dixie has finally had someone say and be willing to foster her whilst we are in our temp place. Sadly it is 3 hours away but weve just got to be lucky that shes found a home which equally means we dont have to give her up long term as that would be heart breaking.

Next up is this bloody flat. I hate it. Its horrible. Its not ideal for me at all. To top it off the landlord is an ass. Weve begged him for Dixie to come with us and even said we would pay for cleaners to come in when we leave but no. He refused to sort out the water in the kitchen as for the last week weve had none. So i had to get on the floor to look and sort which is never good as i cant get off the bloody floor so my other half had to help me. Next up we went there to day to drop more stuff off and the bloody bay window roof is being ripped out and we hadnt been told. Im pretty sure we had to have 48 hours notice and yet we had none. We also still havnt received our electric key to be able to put money on the electric. We got told last wednesday 24 hours and we will have it. But no,again nothing. Which means weve £3 on the meter, a freezer full of food and i cant neb. Grand. It all just seems a night mare.

All of this and im also shitting it about money. I know we will be fine but im a huge ocd worry bean about money to the extent i have a book, write what goes in and out and what weve left for the month and then each day i write how much has been spent and then calculate how much remains. At the moment it seems like we are £200 better off living independantly but weve not hade the correct amount of bills yet so all that could change.

Im also confused as to whats happening about my immunology infusions as ive not been contacted and its been nearly a month now.

The wedding is coming up and i know longer have any idea of what is left to buy as its all in stupid boxes

My other halfs 21st is also coming up and im worrying that we wont have the money for me to make it special for her.

To tope it off, today it seems like my pharmacy wanted to kill me again. Remember the error a few weeks back about my steroids. Well i made a complaint and that got sorted BUT today, as usuall walking out the door i checked my drugs so i didnt drive all the way home and see a mistake. I opened the bag and saw the words Sando-k and though what the heck i dont take that. I take phosphate. Took it back in and said er uve given me the complete wrong drug. Her answer was "i though it was strange when i was second checking it" i replied saying well its a gokd job i know my drugs else this time next week i could have been dead. Its not like it was a simple error or omeprazole or anything it was a potential fatality error. Its shocking.

TTFN

XXXX

Busy, Excited, Tired...All In One

These last few days have been very hecric but amazing at the same time.

We did manage to go away which i am so pleased about.

First off we paid a visit to my sister as my other half baked her the most amazing birthday cake ever so we went and had tea with her, gave her all her presents and webt and seen the finished nursery. So excited as theres literally on 2 or 3 weeks left and the baby should be here.

Following my sister we went off to Dorset, Sunday night was just a chill night with a few dvds, relaxing ready for our big day.

Our donor text us saying he was early but it was ok as we were ready and excited. He is so funny as he fitted us in between a trip to the tip and shopping at morrisons before picking up his son from school. Im so glad that he found us as we couldnt have found a better man to "father" our child.

Post doing the deed, we decided to take a random trip to Glastonbury to go charity shop shopping where we baught 8 baby items for £4. I absolutly love charity shops. We then went and had a proper realy banana milkshake with ice cream. Yum...well my girlfriend had a banoffee one but it was still uber lush.
To top off our amazing day, we then went and had a meal at the pub next to our hotel. I really do love spending these little days out with my lady.

On Tuesday I decided to take my other half to Clarks Village as shes never been there before either. We had a lush bit of retail therapy and i really treated her. She deserves it after all hehe.

Over the last few days ive been waking up with really bad migraines again. Thankfully though because i have been doing the over night oxygen readings its been showing that its clearly low oxygen levels that is causing it as they dropped down to 82% most nights.

In other good news, 4 weeks later ive finally cleared my chest infection so i am super pleased. I hate the fact it takes so long to shift but i guess thats just my crappy body.

Well, we find out if we have had any luck with our donor around the 25th July so if you could all keep your fingers and toes crossed for us I would be super pleased as i really cant wait to have a child with the most beautiful girl in the world.

TTFN

XXXX

Waiting For A Change

Sadly im still pretty much in the same mental state, no better but also no worse. Though i do wish that it would get better as its really playing on my mind.

On Thursday it was my best friends birthday and both myself and my oher half with my best friend went to alton towers. I drove us up there as im not a huge fan of coaches.

I was in my wheelchair all day as I just couldnt cope out of it. Because we got disability passes we were also allowed "special" passes which meant that we got to que jump and go straight to the front of every ride. With having this is meant we got on ever ride which was amazing.

By about 5pm i decided to stand up and stretch my legs for 5 minutes ready for the 6 hour drive home. Sadly though because another migraine had started hitting me, as i stood up i ended up collapsing straight down to the floor. Was out for the count on the floor of alton towers for an hour. When i woke up i felt really week, breathless, was shivering and generally felt like crap. I started driving us home but within an hour i had to stop at the services as i just couldnt cope anymore. After a good rest we set off again.

Thankfully my dad lives 10 minutes from my best friends house in bristol so i rang hime up telling him we were crashing at his house for the night. I literally felt like crap.

On friday, we set off home again stopping near on every hour and when we got home i literally went straight upstairs and slept for hours.

Something really took it out of me. My temperature has been sky high since and i am feeling chesty so ill be sending another sputum sample on monday in the hope itll give answers.

My other half has been making her owl cake that someone has ordered and it looks blinking amazing, ill have to show u all a picture once its complete.

TTFN

XXXX

Really!?

For me today has been reasonably ok. Ive literally only been able to get out of bed twice though literally today. On the second occasion i collapsed also which was a gutting blow.

Myself and my partner had a great zebra baby grow arrive today for our future child. Its blinking lush. Yes you may say but your not pregnant, but for us, because we cant work, our theory is if we start buying things gradually over the months, our baby will have everything they need and deserve and can have the best start in life.

I also had my birthday present arrive. My DIY 35mm slr camera.

After just under 2 hours, I had completed the challenge of my big build and it absolutly shattered me...I ended up falling asleep for an hour and a half afterwards just to recover but im pleased with the end result. Now just to get 35mm film.

In other news though my lady has had terrible period pains. Ok i suffer from other sorts of pains but ive been lucky in the sense ive never had period pains. She was in tears and i had no idea what to do to help her other than drug her up on pain releif. She ended up curled up next to me with a hot water bottle and thankfully a few hours later everything had settled down again. God knows what shes going to be like during labour if this was painful for her though ha. Ive gotta try and get my arse out of bed tomorrow though as Dixie has the vets so untill tomorrow... TTFN XXXX

Not Your Typical Sunday!!

Panic struck last night. After roughly 10 minutes after we turned off the lights to settle to sleep, I started coughing. At first I though, ah its only a cough...and then it continued and each breath I tried taking I was coughing instantly and I couldnt catch my breath, then, my chest went tight. The minute this second stage happen I thought, bollocks, I cant have an attack now, I must get to Dorset this week. So, on goes the lights again, and off with the nebs I go, thankfully, because I jumped on it as quickly as it arrived. A few nebs and I was settled so I was a happy bunny and went to sleep. Today on the other hand, I swear the pollen count is high. My throat is so itchy and scratchy (shoooow...sorry had to add that in) and irritated that its like im swollowing glass, that and a streaming nose and just generally feeling yucky, hay fever style!! I have a funny feeling that yhese new antihistamines arnt liking my body as much and I may have to go back to my old ones. Again this rash on my face that ive been telling you about decided to reappear. We really are confused as to what could be causing it. Its not overly itchy, but its coming up in the exact same places as what it always is and its like a red/orange sort of colour. It really is baffleing us. I guess if it persists ill have to go to the docs about that also...oh they are going to love me!! In chirpier news though, we took the pup around the feild again this morning and she had a good old paddle in the stream. Then we took her to a shop called trago, got her a jumping hoop to practice some agility tricks. We also took her around the pond that is there also. After our trip there, we were off to our friends who live near Looe. We got invited for dinner with them and it was super lush. We nattered masses and she also gave me my birthday present. Yes ok its late, but (and a huge but) im going to let her off as she made it herself, and when you have a 7 month old teething baby, thats going to be a huge challenge. Anyway, it was a knitted slouch hat made in rainbow cours with its main colour yellow which is epic as its my favourite colour. I love it that much its been on my head from the minute she gave it me to the minute ive jumped into bed. Whilst we were with our friend, because the live in the middle of nowgere in the country side, we went for a little gander to the next farm over to have a look at the new baby lambs. I just wish I had my blinking camera. After all this excitment, I decided my car was now disgustingly filfthy, so we went to the car wash. Dixie was petrified and when the turny clothy thing was coming at us, Dixie couldnt have backed up and further into my lap. Atleast we can say shes heard new noises. With all this business going on, when we got home I literally collapsed on the sofa. We found out that my other halfs sister has been really sad today as shes having a lot of problems with her lower back. Recently she got diagnosed with a curviture of the spine and it is leaving her in agony despite being on lots of pain releif. Along with this, because of the pain and the drugs shes currently on, she cant drive to work and she also cant do her job because shes a midwife. I feel mega sorry for her as I know exactly how she feels. Because she lives roughly 200 miles away from us I felt helpless so me and my other half decided to send her a balloon through the post. Its great. Its a tortoise that has little feet that weigh the helium balloon down so in theory it walks when you pull it along with the string. We just hope it makes her smile, even if just for five brief minutes!! We will let you know. Its due to be delivered on Tuesday!! Well thats all for now... TTFN XXXX

Better Week Than Last

This week has been a little all over the place, on Monday I had to go and have bloods take as my phosphate keeps dropping for no particular reason, and when I rang up for the results today it seems that it has drooped again. We now have to wait as see for how this can be treated. My other galf also started a volunteering post at Bernados children charity which she is going to be doing every Monday. Im so pleased that she has found the courage to do something like this as it gives her a sense of purpose whilst also allowing her to make new friends. Once I had picked her up, I suprised her with a little picnic and our pup and we went and had a "naughty hot chocolate" at a local woods. Tuesday was my birthday. Admittedly I wasnt looking forward to it at all as for the past ten years since my nan died on my thirteenth birthday they have always been crap or domething bad has happened. This year though was suprisinglt alright. Me and the lady went and had a costa drink at lunch time and then in the evening we had a table booked at pizza hut. This was chosen as the lady has never ever been to pizza hut, or any pizza place infact and I absolutly love the cookie dough pudding. I also had lots of mini ice cream cone birthday cakes made for me which were absolutly scrummy. Wednesday was a dvd day. The weather was so bad that it was to dangerous for us to go anywhere. We also had to bring the rabbits indoors because they had been blown over. I realy though that our grampher rabbit Spice would have died through trauma just because of his age but thankfully all is great. Yesterday was a special day for me and my girlfriend as it was this time last year that we done a sponsored walk for asthma uk and in the evening she had proposed to me. So we have now been engaged for a year. My other half wanted to make it all special for me so cooked heart shaped pancakes for breakfast and then in the afternoon she cooked a three course meal to which I have to say was bloody lush. Its valentines day to day and yet again the weather is shocking. We gave each other presents this morning. I got some choc a block rocky rock hot chocolate, a bracelet and a genie lap to make my three biggest wishes come true and I gave my lady two chocolate roses and a photo book of our last year together. We also decided to go swimming to burn off all the rubbish weve eaten this week as we want to continue our weightloss. This afternoon though we have a challenge on our hands as for the first time we are going to be puttingvour two baby rabbits Norbert and Gizmo in the same hutch. They have been in the run together plenty of times but never in the same hutch. Wish us luck TTFN XXXX

Here, There and Everywhere!!

Life has been a little hectic over the past few weeks with having different hospital appointments and travelling up and down the country. Hospital appointments have consisted of going to Plymouth hospital to have over an hours worth of lung function tests so that they can get a good idea of how my lungs dont work, and then I am seeing the new Consultant in January at some point so that should be interesting. I have also have a fracture clinic appointment following my fall a few weeks ago and breaking my wrist. The consultant there isnt to happy with my xray results so has requested that I have a CT scan which is in just over a weeks time. so thats slightly annoying that this has happened. I have also had my second appointment with the other hip doctor who was a little bit annoying actually as he didnt really have a clue and is referring me to yet another doctor and has suggested that I have the steroid injections again in my hip (which didnt work the first time) and then if that doesnt work they will then look at what else can be done before the route of a hip replacement. I have also been back up to see mum recently as it was her birthday and well, it was slightly awkward to say the least and I came away a little upset. firstly, she opened the present that we gave her whilst I was in the toilet and then just put it on the side and didnt even say thanks, where as with my sisters she opened it all whilst everyone was there and said a massive thank you. secondly, she didnt even really speak to my other half which is really starting to hack me off as it has been well over a year now and she still cant seem to come to terms with things and accept who I am engaged to. Thirdly, I have found out that my sister has been going around mums and having little drinking sessions with her and that they have been going out shopping and generally having a good time, Im gutted with this as me and mum never really done anything like this and now that I have moved away she seems to be getting on really well with my sister. And finally, my mum in front of everyone asked my sister if she wanted to come around for christmas day and completely ignored me, so as a result I have decided that Im not going to see any of my family at christmas because I dont feel like they want me to see them, I no longer feel accepted by them and that they want me to be in their lives let alone my partner as well. On happy notes, myself and my partner have officially been together for just over a year now and it is exciting. We decided to treat ourselves, and spend two nights away in Newquay. Whilst away we went to the cinema and seen Gravity which is a pretty amazing film, we also went to the seal sanctuary which although was cold, was really amazing to see all the different seals and also the poorly ones in the hospital who are being really well looked after. We also went and had a MASSIVE chinese which was lush, but we ate far to much. My other half also introduced me to the hunger games which is a great film, very well put together!! so we had a busy couple of days, just us enjoying each others company. My other half also had her 20th birthday which was great. She was ultimatly spoiled by both her parents and myself with lots of different gifts to keep her busy some of which included pyrography (which shes done one already and it looks amazing, ive never seen it before and I really like how its turned out!!) and she also got an air brushing machine to be able to decorate her cakes with. We also went out for a meal, both of us and her parents which was great as weve never actually done that before so it was a nice treat for us all. On sad news though, Ive had yet another assessment with the community physio team and they have now decided that Im going to have to have a wheelchair when out in the community as my muscles have gotten far to weak and im having to many falls which is compromising my safety. I am a little gutted by this but I guess it had to come at some point hey. My photography is coming along great, I recently entered a photo into a competition and im awaiting the results so ill let you all know when that happens. These photos were taken with the help of my lovely lady dressing up in a stunning dress and having some nice make up on. One of our friends have also asked me to take photos of her and her baby in a few weeks time also so although im a little nervous about it, im also excited as itll be my first official shoot with people and not of still life. So, thats my life for now. TTFN XXXX

Ubber Cool Weekend!!

Recently myself and the mother have been spending lots and lots of time together which so super lush!!

This weekend we went to Cadbury Garden Centre, had a gander around all their Christmas decorations (spent far to much money yet again) and then shared a scone and had a yummy toffee nut latte from starbucks...mmmmmmm

Once that little adventure was over we went and paid a visit to a friend of my mums who she hasnt seen in a blinking long time, and from what I could tell, she had a thoroughly good day which is great!!

Well, then it was an early night for me as I had to be up at a crazy hour to drive to Exeter to meet the other half!!

Although it was crappy weather the day was bloody amazing, I started the day off.by deciding not to use my sat nav and got lost *twit*. Then I could fond the right car park, and low ans behold, I then got re lost trying to fins the museum, *DoubleTwit* to which I finally found, half hour later.

The whole day consisted of visiting the museum, having a walk around a stunning park *RaindropDodging*, having lunch in Marks and Sparks and then shopping!! A great day that I really did enjoy, yay!!

Well that sums up my little weekend, Im all smilies and super happy, life couldnt be better (forgetting about my cruddy health of course)

TTFN

XXXX